life. laughter. love

fuck you

Okay, so you have a girlfriend. We’re not together, we don’t like each other like that anymore, its clear. But since you’re with her I don’t understand why you think it’s okay to text me. Yeah we’re “friends” but with our history, if I was your girlfriend that would not be okay with me, and it’s not okay with me to keep talking to you without this girl knowing.  I have no respect for shady bullshit like that. You say that, “I’m a romantic, if I like a girl enough then I want to be with her” but why the hell would you put this poor girl through dating you, when she thinks that she can’t talk to other people, but you feel like it’s okay to do? I’ve lost all respect for you. The fact that you asked me what was wrong and when I tried to explain myself you called me “immature” and said that I wasn’t making any sense? If we really were friends like you say we are, you would hear me out and talk it out with me and understand where I’m coming from, not be a stupid dick because you can’t have your cake and eat it too. I’ve felt second best my whole life in everything I’ve done, and the fact that what we had supposedly meant so much to you yet I was never enough for you to date, in a way makes me feel pretty damn stupid for believing you, but then again if you think its okay to be talking to other girls when you’re in a relationship? I’m glad things never got taken to the next step. But stop acting like you can push me around and talk to me whenever you’re not with your girlfriend, because I refuse to feel second best to anyone, especially you. And when I start to feel like that, I’m obviously going to back away from the person making me feel that way, so that’s the reason why. I just wish it wasn’t so hard for me to get out to you.

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I get myself in situations with you where my heart says one thing and my head says another. My heart tells me that I still have feelings for you. It tells me how right it is when we talk and makes feel the way I used to. It reminds me of what I had to let go, and at times I think that having that little piece of you to still talk to and make things seem a little more normal with us is all I need. But then my head tells me that you fucked me over. You hurt me more than anyone ever has. It tells me to blow you off, stop talking to you and just move on with my life without you because I deserve better. My heart always seems to win though and pull me towards you. I don’t know if thats a sign that if I’m following my heart that it’s the right thing to do, or that I’m just not strong enough to let you go. Either way, I don’t know why you’re the only one I have a such hard time knowing what the right things is. When anyone else fucks me over, I say bye, I’m done. So why is it so different with you…..

my opinion on people hating on the gays.

YOU’RE WASTING YOUR TIME. I’m sick of seeing people post things all over about how being gay isn’t “natural” or that it’s not in the bible. God created everybody, and if being gay wasn’t natural or right then why would he make gay people? People are born gay, they don’t choose to be no matter what your opinion is on that, there is only one way to look at it because its a fact. And why would God say that he treats everyone equally if that didn’t apply to gay people, the people that he created? So everyone needs to stop it with this God bullshit and that being the reason why they don’t believe in people being gay, because that’s the biggest contradiction I’ve ever heard. The more you hate, the more negative attention you give yourself and the more attention you give them. People say that the gays have the right to say whatever and do whatever, and thats because you hating on them constantly gives them that right! They constantly have to defend themselves from assholes. If you wouldn’t hate on them and would keep your rude opinions to yourself, they wouldn’t have all these “days” devoted to them. Nobody dislikes us straight people or talks so much shit about us, so why would we have a day devoted to us for being straight, a day to defend our beliefs? It’s all because us straight people are giving them a reason to have all these days for them, and I think it’s great. It doesn’t matter how much anyone hates it or shit talks it, gay people aren’t going anywhere. People aren’t going to stop being gay because you don’t like it. So it’s about time you face the facts and realize that this isn’t going anywhere. Love my gay boys <3

things to do once i get a jobbb <3

1. START TANNING AGAIN

2. w/ J-Wow’s tanning lotion

3. get extensions

4. SHOP, cause it’s been too long.

5. Buy new songs for ipod.

6. Shoot, since I always forget that I don’t have one, buy an ipod

7. Save money to move!!

8. Save money for vacation in july.

9. Be able to start paying for everything on my own so my mother can’t hold it over my head.

10. Be able to go out and do things without borrowing money from ppl

11. Teeth whitening!!

Like I mean I don’t even know why you girls bother at this point Like give up, its me, I win you lose

Is this really happening right now? Getting accused of my friends “changing” into me, hanging out with me too much, and not spending time with other people? How is that even my fault? I wasn’t aware that I had so much power as to change the way people feel about other people and force them to hang out with me. You need to realize that you make choices that make people either want to or not want to hang out with you, and your friends are the ones choosing. Nobody can force anyone to do anything that they don’t want to do. face the facts and realize that IT’S YOU. And the more you sit here and bitch and complain instead of doing something and, i dont know, YOU putting some effort into your friendship with this person, then you would pull your head out of your ass long enough to realize that I have absolutely no control in this situation. so everyone needs to learn to keep my name out of their mouth for ridiculous fucking reasons.

P.S I FUCKED YOUR BOYFRIEND. and all of your friends who are my friends know about it but none of them have told you? Maybe you should check who your friends are and stay away from mine, cause this just proves who they like better.